Or What have I been focusing on in relation to assisting and supporting my physical body?
I realize that I have not yet shared some of the seemingly ‘unimportant’ points (according to my mind) that I do test out and apply in my day to day related to physical movement and support.
There’s so much understanding about who we are in our minds and how we essentially handicap ourselves through experiences that we accept and allow, that essentially we can challenge ourselves in every move, as minute as it can be, and testing this out in terms of how much we limit ourselves in our self-movement for example based on notions of tiredness, or plain laziness as in ‘leaving something for later’ when in fact, who we are as the body is always ‘ready’ and ‘stable’ and ‘running’ as in being processing and living, doing all we need to keep ourselves alive, while we are at a conscious level very unaware of it all. I’ve taken so much of my body for granted for a long time and I am becoming more inclined to focus more on it, considering that I am one of those persons that believes ‘I am not in contact with my body’ or ‘cannot perceive the changes that food creates in it’ or ‘can’t identify the state in which my body is’ – but, lately, this has been changing bit by bit.
I’ll share some examples of testing things out more at a physical level in terms of physical support. I’ve challenged myself for now over a year and a half to start jogging, which is something I truly thought I was just not meant to do/not capable of doing at all, and I did the whole thing of starting small, bit by bit building the condition, the consistency, the direction that is required to also get to jog which is early in the morning which means creating a discipline to wake up early and start exercising and being directive instead of giving into ‘tiredness’ or just plain laziness. One thing I’ve recently noticed is that I had wanted my condition to develop ‘faster’ like not getting tired at all while jogging, or not getting any muscle pains after jogging or exercising – but this still comes up and in referencing these points, there is this patience that exists in developing a condition, not ‘waiting’ for a particular experience at some point around it, but just doing it, while also keeping an eye on how my body goes responding to it.
And I have been testing many things on how my body fluctuates in this condition based on ‘the time of the month’ and based on the foods that I take, based on the amount of sleep, shoes, weather… lots of things that can create a variable in my experience when exercising, though I did notice that I had been too ‘pushy’ at times with doing it every single day and even if noticing that maybe I’d like some ‘day off’ in some periods of time, I just didn’t give myself/my body this time off and so what started happening recently is that my ‘time frame’ of jogging became more, meaning I was going slower and having more and more pains in the body therefore feeling the whole jog time as a really ‘hard time.’
After I reference this experience, I realized I did ‘kind of knew’ deep inside me that: hey maybe you have to slow down a bit with doing this every single day and instead give the body a rest – but here, I imposed my discipline (my mind) upon my body in this idea that I had to do it ‘every single day’, which means I wasn’t really listening to the pain in the body related to ‘doing it every day’ and considering a more supportive schedule for it.
So, I cross-referenced this and got to consider not doing it ‘every day’ but one day jogging and one day off and so forth – and I got to see the difference quite noticeably which was a very cool lesson here to see how yes my body stands as that resilience, that ability to ‘keep going’ but, I also have to stand as that equilibrium, that ‘measure’ where I don’t push myself ‘more’ than what I can physically stand and so also listening to/considering my physical body in this, which in my case and my physical body means not ‘overdoing’ something to follow my mind’s notion of discipline, but to Listen to my body as well and not take the pains as just something that ‘will always be there.’ And this is just the beginning of this process of re-adjusting ‘my ways’ imposed to exercising, but decided to share so as to not wait until I have walked this point for another year and a half to share the results, because I had not even shared in a blog about this process of starting to jog for the first time as part of a daily exercise routine which I still have to normalize in terms of the recent discoveries around it. Possibly one day jogging, the other day just stretching and or resting completely and then jogging again the next day, will see.
Here, it might seem ‘easy’ for anyone familiar with exercise or sports to make a decision like this, but to me, I always ‘disliked’ sports and jogging around was like a penitence in school, so it’s been definitely awesome to see how I can stand as a point of self-movement and actually MOVE as my body, to persevere in that decision as well that I’ve made which I of course have to admit hasn’t always been ‘immovable’ as there’s been full weeks I haven’t gotten to do the jogging wherein the reason can vary – the time of the month, some minor physical discomfort, ‘being more tired’ which has to do with the mind entirely and so sorting that aspect out – but I also don’t judge myself because that only creates a pit of regret of which is difficult to step out, but instead simply make a clear decision at night ‘going at it again tomorrow’ and so, live the words: do the waking up in the morning, start with stretching and then off we go to the track in the park. This is one seemingly simple ‘discipline’ but, it has assisted me quite a bit with pushing my own beliefs and boundaries on having a ‘bad condition’ or ‘not the kind of body that is suitable for running’ or ‘having a weak heart’ and all sorts of beliefs I also contributed to build throughout my life, which I mostly fueled in order to escape physical education class lol, and other social situations like going to hikings and things like that because I believed I would not be able to endure it, which was yes also a case but probably had to do with developmental years or something.
So, this has been also a process of testing out my ‘endurance’ in my body. I also continue to test out what foods work for my body, and definitely more than interested to learn to read my body more, to become more physically aware because I had neglected myself quite a lot in giving more value to the mind and not at all to myself, my body, the substance that is here as this whole ‘thing’ that allows me to breathe, live and be here, that one constant ‘companion’ as me that continues to stand and breathe and do all of its processes regardless of how I might feel in my head… and this is something to acknowledge and honor as the physical body and so, it’s been a commitment for me to not follow the usual trends where people ‘grow older’ and start also growing bigger, but instead to challenge that to a point that is suitable for my body and within this learning to honor and care for my body, not for appearance sake, but to be ‘fit’ as in functional, in good health and condition which is an inner and outer process that I can give to myself and can relate to the time and process it takes to cook meals for myself that I can enjoy, that I can also do for my partner and both have been paying a lot more attention to this whole health aspect for the sake of considering our physical body, which has been very supportive. I see this as a ‘no brainer’ to focus on as well in my day to day living.
Another point we’ve been testing for probably half a year now is to massage every day, yep! I always saw this as impossible like ‘yeah come on, how can that be done!’ but fortunately my partner is quite the diligent man when he proposes to do something, so he’s been quite directive in this mutual support and making the schedule/time for it, even in times when it’s been one of those ‘long days’ we might shorten it to a back massage instead of a full body massage, but needless to say that this is also a daily test for me to see ‘who am I’ and ‘Where am I’ while massaging and it’s been really great to see how there was a ton of resistances to move to do the massage, of course! We like to receive isn’t it? But when it came to me, man, I did have to push myself until we continued to discuss this presence that we have to be and stand as while massaging, not focusing on ‘something else’ but moving, moving as the body, as that support that we want to give to ourselves as each other. So, this consistency in daily massage has been yet another awesome physical point of support to develop consistency, to the point where it is only now I’d say becoming a lot more physical and ‘natural’ if you will to do so, to make it part of the routine of the day which also proves that doing/building/creating something in physical reality and making it ‘the new me’ as ‘our new nature’ takes time.
Massaging has also been extremely supportive in terms of the relationship, having that moment to come together and assist our physical bodies and definitely has assisted in those days as well where there were moments of disagreements or misunderstandings where that becomes the physical point of confronting each other and in essence walk a forgiveness and laying out things clear while massaging and wrapping up the day in that decision to support each other in the massage. It has also been a great way to initiate sex as well, which I’ve also found out many times I still get the notion of ‘naaah not now’ but I also then have been testing this point of physically moving, physically making that decision to express and voilà, it works, absolutely. And these thus have been moments where I have been definitely applying myself in deciding ‘who am I’ in these very physical activities that I would usually as per habit still bring some laziness or procrastination around it.
So these things are one of the more ‘physical’ aspects in my process yet have had a clear support to myself, my body and in this case my relationship as well since we are both on the same track when it comes to assisting our bodies, learning how to eat better and I have to say that I have learned a lot from his consistency and diligence in his own routines and ways, which I take as an example to do the same and stand equal to what I see he’s being capable of following through with. So, it’s a great set of pointers to integrate to one’s relationship as well, physical activities and physical body care, along with obviously the mind processing that goes with it, very, very fulfilling and assisting ‘real time’ with real challenges that sure, can be met with ‘resistance’ initially but the trick is to keep breathing, keep ‘going’ and that’s where I’ve seen how I can stand as these words that the physical body represents to me, which is for now very much geared in this self-movement and pushing some previously-imposed boundaries/limitations onto myself and so my body. This awareness andprocess at a physical level is also only one of the outflows of walking theDesteni Process where one does not only integrate realizations at a mind level, but is then able to live them through at a physical level in the seemingly ‘small details’ of our day to day lives. I’m forever grateful to have done this rotund change in my ‘lifestyle’ with this process
Thanks for reading.